"Goodbye, It's been interesting but not for us..."
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Lakeland Click to EMail LakelandClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 02:24 AM (CST)
"Goodbye, It's been interesting but not for us..."
I came to say goodbye to this website. I found this site by accident a couple of weeks ago, and feel it is an amazing site for Advice, Support and Comfort in the many many issues that surround hsv. When it comes to advice on when to tell, how to tell, should I tell, and a million other questions that are out there, everyone seems to be anxious to help.

But, when someone asked a very specific question regarding transmission, she received sixty some posts. Most of them were yes vs. no. And some got heated when challenged. Do you think this actually did her any good? And since that post, a couple of others have appeared. I just can't take part in something that refuses to seek outside help when it is obvious that in here you are mainly going to get opinion. Before you say that outside help IS merely opinion, let me say that it is professional counselors, who are trained in updated information.

Someone said that the experts only give info for generalized instances. I said CHALLENGE them. Tell them your specific question or concern just as you have told everyone on these forums. But I seriously doubt anyone has done that. Because it is my feeling that most of you here prefer to stay in these "walls" rather than seek outside advise on matters such as these.

It has gotten me to the point where I cannot continue to visit this site, because I am beginning to question myself and all that I THOUGHT I knew. I have become paranoid and nervous around my kids. Why is that? Because in the time I have spent here, I have read countless times over that most kids by age 5 will have contracted oral herpes, that hsv 1 is so much better to have than hsv 2 because the ob are less frequent and severe. That is not always true. My husband and I are both hsv 2 and he has had one ob other than his primary in six yrs. I have about three/yr and they are mild. We don't have oral H, but it seems the majority either states we have it and don't know it or we will probably get it. Why do you KNOW this, because you have it ? It may be true, but I will just say this on hsv 1 and your ideas that it is so easily passed around. My niece has hsv 1 since she was probably nine. NOONE in her family nor mine has it. We don't treat her any differently, we don't designate a separate drinking glass, silverware or anything else. She knows when she has an ob and doesn't kiss anyone. Other than that she is not looked at as a potential risk. So to tell everyone that they will most likely get it is only putting fear and panic in their minds and hearts.

This is not support nor therapy. To me, this is coming from people who feel rotten about themselves or their situation and won't feel better without posting this stuff so others may feel worse. And no, I am not in denial. I know quite a bit about this virus actually. If anyone has read my intro post, and my reply about pregnancy and hsv or my reply on dosages, you'd know that I have done my research when we were pregnant. I subscribed to the Helper ( which is wonderful )and called the hotlines often during my first pregnancy.

When someone asks a specific question, do them a favor and quide them to reputable websites and phone numbers and still share your experience, but don't try your hardest to convince him/her that just because you think you caught H that way from a toilet, tub, chewing on a pencil or whatever, that it is going to happen. That is not helping that person. It is a wonderful thing to debate, but stop and think about the person who is hanging on your every word. Give them some sound advice, and urge them to call a counselor. Doesn't anyone ask their physician these things? There are many free and discounted clinics out there as well that are well informed.

This is not sour grapes because I feel no one listened to my advice. I just cannot continue to visit here when it seems so obvious most feel they can advise on issues of scientific fact within this forum only. Rubes has strongly suggessted to visit websites and call hotlines as well, and each time it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears.

Feel free to post replies, but don't do it for my benefit as I won't be checking in any longer. I am not angry, just frustrated and dissappointed. I at first thought I stumbled upon something wonderful, but now I realize that I have come to terms with my status a long time ago, and to come here has only put doubts in my head about things. I don't need doubts. I have felt comfortable with H and learned to live with it. But now I must go and clear my head from all of this. I must admit I was becoming addicted to this site, but when I started seeing all of the stuff circulating around the transmission post, especially the one by the person who stated she was a virgin and caught h via a toilet seat. God, it just got to be too much.

Keep up the good work on comforting and sharing stories. And good luck to rubes, I know you had urged people to seek out web sites and hotlines as well. Remember, God helps those who help themselves. To tell people it CAN happen is a lie. At best, no one knows for sure, least of all us. At least the hotline people have updated info at their fingertips. What are some of you afraid of, being told you did not contract H via your toilet?

Good luck to those ladies who want to have children. It is very much possible. Ask your OB and most will tell you the same and talk to them about suppressive therapy at the end. Things change all of the time, so be sure to get the latest information.

peace,
Lakeland

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 Table of contents

1st post, blackcloud, Nov-21-99, (1)
blackcloud...., lisx, Nov-21-99, (2)
I guess the thing is...., Laurie, Nov-21-99, (3)
thanks, Laurie, windy, Nov-21-99, (4)
I dunno, Wombat, Nov-21-99, (7)
clarification, Wombat, Nov-21-99, (10)
Wombat...., lisx, Nov-22-99, (16)
Oh golly, Wombat, Nov-22-99, (17)
......., Wombat, Nov-22-99, (19)
Thanks to Lakeland, Sami, Nov-21-99, (5)
final thought, Sami, Nov-21-99, (6)
Sami's Last Post, Tina, Nov-21-99, (8)
Hang on there...., Laurie, Nov-21-99, (13)
I agree with you, Laurie.., Rajah, Nov-21-99, (14)
Huh???, J, Nov-22-99, (15)
Leaving, Wombat, Nov-22-99, (18)
I would second that nomination., Rajah, Nov-22-99, (20)
Yea, I know Raj., Laurie, Nov-22-99, (21)
Re: Lakeland's Post, Toni, Nov-21-99, (9)
so sorry, me, Nov-21-99, (11)
this website, anonymous medical person, Nov-21-99, (12)
since you're a "medical" ..., rubes, Nov-22-99, (22)
?, Keyser Soze, Nov-22-99, (23)
reality, had2be, Nov-23-99, (24)
This web site, Cantaloupe Antelope, Nov-28-99, (25)

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Messages in this topic

blackcloud Click to EMail blackcloudClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 04:26 AM (CST)
1. "1st post"
I must say that I somewhat agree with you Lakeland. I have been visiting this site for 5 weeks after I had my 1st ob. I haven't been diagnosed yet because I waited to long, the blisters had scabbed over by the time I made it to the clinic. I am patiently awaiting my next ob.

From this site,and the attitude of the doctor I seem to feel that its all guesswork. This virus obviously affects everyone differently and nobody has the answers.

This forum does scare people...when you do tell your partner, have them stay clear of this site. Over three years ago I meet a wonderful lady with herpes, I stayed with her for a few months all the while reading up on info. The information I received here scared me and definitely helped lead me away from her....my loss.

I am not very aware of how this affects me mentally. I have had maybe 6 sober nights in the last 5 weeks. I am hoping to get back on my feet and learn to deal with this.

Unlike Lakeland I will continue to visit and would like to post more...but most of the time I am not much of a talker or writer.

Good luck all

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lisx Click to EMail lisxClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 06:02 AM (CST)
2. "blackcloud...."
So sorry that you feel that way about this site, but I am glad that you are going to stick around. I have found this site to be the best source of information and support available to me since diagnosis thirteen months ago. It is true that from time to time there are threads which lead to contentious debate, but all in all, it is a great place to come to ask a question or request help/support. Usually, those people who do engage in disagreements are people who have been around for a long time, and "Know" each other quite well in the cyber context...and it usually has quite friendly undertones which may not be obvious to a newbie who is unfamiliar with the characters who visit the HHP regualary.

Please continue to visit us here, and ask any questions you have. Feel free to share your story with us and let people support you. It is always great to see a new face around.

Love,lisx

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Laurie Click to EMail LaurieClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 07:35 AM (CST)
3. "I guess the thing is...."
LAST EDITED ON Nov-21-99 AT 10:21 PM (EST)

And this website might not be for everyone based on your thoughts, but I'd like to put out a couple of my own. And it's a shame if you're not checking back -- casting the last stone and leaving.

Most of us with strong opinions have them because we were brought up to think for ourselves. Most of us with strong opinions have them because we HAVE researched thoroughly, consulted the experts, etc., etc.

And that's what I urge everybody to do. Consult the experts and COME TO YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS. But all too often, experts disagree. In my opinion, what makes an expert is someone who has done the research, explored all the information, and has come to their conclusion with a lot of thought and intelligence. Many of the people on this board fall into this category. And we don't all agree. Who can be considered more of an expert than someone who HAS this, and has read the research papers, consulted the "professional"s, and has added a heavy dose of common sense to the pot before reaching their decision?

Unfortunately, we don't always agree. The PROFESSIONAL experts don't always agree. We challenge each other, and that makes us think more. This is good, for us. It might not ALWAYS be good for the newbie but it is too difficult to create a forum where you have the short "safe" answers for those who don't want to think about it and who are likely to become paranoid, and the long, debated, thought-out answers that really shouldn't scare anybody but do. Segregating this forum into parts has been tried and not too successful. So we just do the best we can. Most of us are not willing to deny each other the benefit of what we have discovered and, indeed, what each of us THINKS, because some individuals are more easily spooked by the information than comforted. See, some of us get comfort from these debates, some of us learn and expand our thoughts based on these debates. And some just become paranoid.

It's just too hard to segregate the two groups, and all the variations inbetween. For someone who wants "just the facts" in the limited version that's available "out there" they should probably go "out there."

We are good at support, as you have seen. But we think for ourselves and we need this outlet to continue to learn and grow about herpes. I think that is a significant part of what this forum does for US. And there is no easy answer here.

Again, most of us who offer heated opinions do not do so blindly or without the input of outside sources. I don't need to quote the source to show that it's been shown that the virus lives on towells. I do not need to quote the source to know that you don't share razor blades. And I don't need anything more than common sense to know that the herpes virus will not distinguish between inanimate objects. I also make sure I stress that it's extremely unlikely, rare, but if you mention the towell you might mention the toilet seat, and it is unfortunate that people might be frightened of the thought that they have to use common sense and basic hygiene. It's no big deal to tell them don't share towells but it IS a big deal to tell them to wipe the seat during OBs? That's ludicrous.

So I guess basically we can't please all the people all the time. It is unfortunate that anyone, especially newbies, are so easily influenced. Yes, you want to consult the experts. And we are not "the" experts. But we are pretty well informed, intelligent people, who benefit from each others thoughts and opinions.

So what is the answer? I dunno.

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windy Click to EMail windyClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 10:06 AM (CST)
4. "thanks, Laurie"
that was well said, and I think it's an accurate assessment of the situation.

Maybe we could all agree to keep the technical debates in the technical section, and maybe Rajah could occasionally remind us when we fail to do that.

windy

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Wombat Click to EMail WombatClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 12:39 PM (CST)
7. "I dunno"
I agree with Laurie that the HHP can do little for people seeking simple, clear answers about what is a complex, unclear malady.

"We are good at support, as you have seen."

But here I'm not so sure. Even on the technical stuff, if you abuse people who won't accept your attempt to explain the complexity of this virus, they may simply go to one of the many other herpes info sources that DO offer a simple, clear (and so inaccurate) take. That's a failure in support.

Then some on here DO offer a too-dogmatic position regarding how to deal with this virus ("read this abstract," "see this site," "go ask so and so"). Not surprising given this dogmatism, abuse can follow for those who fail to accept this 'wisdom.' Another failure in support.

Finally, getting away from the technical stuff, even just on lifestyle issues the recent 'support' discussions on this forum indicate that the HHP can be too ready to condemn. It isn't easy to catch a virus which can have enormous implications for sexual intimacy for the rest of one's life. That new visitors don't buy the HHP "always tell" line from day one should not be surprising. Again though, the HHP is often too quick to condemn, often rudely. These visitors leave, and so does the HHP's opportunity to help these individuals better understand the implications of being HSV . Another failure of support.

And the 'fault' doesn't lie simply at the feet (keyboard fingers?) of those who traditionally have been quick to condemn. The silent majority on this forum who have long, long failed to take a stand against this rudeness are also to blame.

And that's my final post. I will never, ever, in a million, no, kajillion years, post another message to this forum.

Wombat

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Wombat Click to EMail WombatClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 03:12 PM (CST)
10. "clarification"
In response to an email query, I repeat not in a kajillion, no, a BAJILLION years will I post here again.

Wombat

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lisx Click to EMail lisxClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 05:23 AM (CST)
16. "Wombat...."
...If you leave, I will feel like an old friend (or fiend!!) has left town. I don't have an email address for you...

I'd like you to mail me if you get this...

liscx@uq.net.au

It would be sad to never hear from you again.

Love, lisx

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Wombat Click to EMail WombatClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 08:48 AM (CST)
17. "Oh golly"
Here, our prayers have been answered:

http://www.smh.com.au/news/9911/22/national/national12.html

And now this will be my very very last ever post, for at least a kajillion (wait, I said that ) a BAjillion years.

Wombat

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Wombat Click to EMail WombatClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 09:03 AM (CST)
19. "......."
"P.S. You girls gotta lay off -- my girlfriend's getting jealous. And by
the way, J, we both think you've been perhaps the most positive,
level-headed person on this forum."

We think you're pretty cool too, Lisa.

Cheers,

Wombat

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Sami Click to EMail SamiClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 11:29 AM (CST)
5. "Thanks to Lakeland"
It doesn't sound like Lakeland will be back to read this, but I would like to thank her anyway. I too, wasn't going to post anymore because of my last post, and the confusion it sent me. Only two people suggested to try some outside information, and I did just that. And I feel so much better for it.

I think she was well informed and just got fed up.
I also don't think it is fair to lump those of us who simply choose to not visit here any longer, into a group who can't handle your long thought out answers. Because if you go back and read some of those long thought out answers, you will notice some of them were just insisting it DID happen to them, case closed. I myself don't have a problem wiping of the toilet seat, but when someone starts saying that she inspects her seat for any drips that may be there, well that is the clear definition of paranoia. And I for one am not going to live that way if I don't have to.

So, upon the advice of Lakeland, I called those hotlines and visited some reputable websites. And am very happy I did. I am sorry to know she won't be back, because I think she had some good advice especially when it came to sharing her pregnancy and hsv experience.

As I said in the beginning, I wasn't going to post anymore, and this will be my last as well.
Maybe everyone can learn something here, and that is you are NOT all-knowing and you don't have the corner on the market of being an 'expert' simply because you have herpes. How do you know that the people who are on the other end of the phone don't have herpes (or worse) just as you do ?

There are so many great,intelligent researchers, and physicians, ect... who learn things each and every day on not only this, but cancer, aids, spinal cord injuries and countless other tragic diseases. Are you telling me that they aren't as smart or well informed if THEY do not have the disease they are trying to cure?

That is just pure ignorance, and I am done here as well.

Sami

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Sami Click to EMail SamiClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 12:09 PM (CST)
6. "final thought"
On your towel theory, I have one thing to say. If it is shown, as you said, to be a possible way to transmit, then why isn't everyone's entire body covered in H sores? I mean when you have an ob and step out of the shower or tub, you DO towel off your entire body, don't you? So ask yourself then, when you dry off the area that is having an ob, and then dry off your arms, legs, face, ect...don't you transfer the virus around with the damp towel?

Let the discussion begin on this and see how many more people ( "newbies" or not ) get nervous. I for one, am will be thrilled to miss it.

Sami

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Tina Click to EMail TinaClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 01:26 PM (CST)
8. "Sami's Last Post"
I hope you do check back here Sami because the question about the towel is stupid! I do not know anyone who wipes that area and then the rest of their body and face, herpes or not! Get real!
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Laurie Click to EMail LaurieClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 10:15 PM (CST)
13. "Hang on there...."
It is not "MY" towell theory.

This is standard advice that has been dished out here since I started coming here, 18 months ago. And some of those who include it in their "standard" advice to newbies are the SAME individuals who insist it won't happen with a toilet seat.

Again. Many of us grow from this type of DEBATE. And no matter how strong our beliefs, MOST of us have learned to make a point about stating our beliefs as opinion and not medical fact. Over time it has come up too many times how we have to use phrases like "I think" "I believe" "It is my opinion." And I know I personally use the phrase "I could be wrong" very often. But I STILL want to TALK about it (that's why I'm here) and I STILL want to hash it out with others who have intelligent although different opinions. THIS is how I learn, this is how I grow, and to suggest that I should only accept information from the so-called experts (and how many doctors STILL tell their patients if you don't have a sore you aren't contagious?) when formulating my ideas and opinions or to incorporate what I believe to be common sense into the equation .. well. Sorry can't do it.

So since intellectual debates (and it's unfortunate that these are often spotted with internal family squabbling but that's life) are apparently not acceptable on this forum, I guess I'll jump on the bandwagon and hightail it out of here.

After all, it was bad enough when Wombat stopped posting daily, but I can't wait a jibillion years to hear his little tidbits of wisdom. It's reached the point where there's no one left to play with.

Shucks. Most of the folks I'd miss the most (because I got to "know" them at a more needy time in my life I suppose) are already long gone. Is there some other place in this vast empty internet where I can find them? I really NEED a good debate now and then.


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Rajah Click to EMail RajahClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 11:52 PM (CST)
14. "I agree with you, Laurie.."
I really thought that this series of threads was pretty mild compared to some of the flame wars that we used to have. I, too, am hoping that Wombat will not stay away that long. Often he is the voice of reason crying in the wilderness.

I think that the toilet seat discussion may have gone a bit far, but I also think that some good information came out of it. Again we are faced with a risk assessment quandry. This time it is a judgement call relating whether the virus can be transferred to a non-living surface, if so how long it can survive and then if it can be transferred so someone else in such a way as to cause infection..

Of course it is "possible". with herpes almost anything is possible in the same way that the stastical principle of Brownian movement says that at some eventual point in time all the air molecules in your room will be on the other side of the chamber and thus you will be asphyxiated.

I am sorry that this discussion has caused some folks to talk of not returning here. I hope they will reconsider. There is much good done here for a lot of folks. If you leave then you contribution is absent.

Giving thanks for all our blessings,

Rajah

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J Click to EMail JClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 04:46 AM (CST)
15. "Huh???"
I'm just curious, is anyone staying?

I read this thread earlier this morning and it mad me feel frustrated and sad. First, I don't think there is anything wrong debating information, papers, or opinions. In fact, I think THAT is the idea of a forum.

Definition:
forum (frm, fr-)
n., pl. forums, also fora (fr, fr).

The public square or marketplace of an ancient Roman city that was the assembly place for judicial activity and public business.
A public meeting place for open discussion.
A medium of open discussion or voicing of ideas, such as a newspaper or a radio or television program.
A public meeting or presentation involving a discussion usually among experts and often including audience participation.
A court of law; a tribunal.

Aside from the purpose of a forum, I feel a lot of people are "threatening" or "punishing" me by suggesting that they will never post again. I ask you this...are you not posting again because of me? Have I offended you? Have I upset you? Have I not been supportive of you? I ask these questions because I feel I am being punished unfairly. Is this the intent of your action?

Is it also not a little childish? I mean, really. If you really didn't want to participate anymore, you could just not post anymore. Why the announcement?

Again, the point of a forum is to have an open discussion about ideas-this one specifically is for HSV. Even so, many of us have grown close over the years and are friends in many ways. It is a shame a bathroom discussion or individual differences could cause such a disturbance. And for Wombat, I know you have a lot people who truly enjoy your participation and that DO support you. I wish you would reconsider-I'll miss your hairy nose.

By the way, its my 3 year anniversary this Thanks Giving. I'm not sure when I found HHP but its been at least 2 and 1/2 years-has it been that long?

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Wombat Click to EMail WombatClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 09:01 AM (CST)
18. "Leaving"
No way, man. I'm outta here, never gonna post again, NOTHING could force me to post even one more post.

Wombat

P.S. You girls gotta lay off -- my girlfriend's getting jealous. And by the way, J, we both think you've been perhaps the most positive, level-headed person on this forum.

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Rajah Click to EMail RajahClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 09:47 AM (CST)
20. "I would second that nomination."
When we are giving thanks for our blessings this week, I suggest that we all should give thanks for having J in our midst on the forum..

(((HUG)))

Rajah

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Laurie Click to EMail LaurieClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 02:48 PM (CST)
21. "Yea, I know Raj."
I didn't see a whole lot of flaming going on, just a nice debate. I thought I was nice. I thought most were nice. I even thought Ruby was nice, just dreaming if she honestly thought anybody was going to drop it, every time she said "let it go" I was soooo tempted to really lay it on thick. But I resisted. I was good.

I think the debate was, all in all, good. Unfortunate if anybody got scared by it, but you know it's rough. And of course, as long as there's still someone to play with I'll be around.

As for you Wombat and your jealous girlfriend. I wanted you first -- before there WAS a jealous girlfriend. So there.

But if he don't play I won't either.

Besides. I can touch my nose with my tongue. Can you?

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Toni Click to EMail ToniClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 01:42 PM (CST)
9. "Re: Lakeland's Post"
I did not mean to upset anybody with my post about being a virgin and aquiring hsv from a toilet seat. I have never ,ever been with a man in any way and my family doctor said that other patients of his have gotten hsv this way. I would appreciate a little support instead of criticism and sarcasm as having to deal with this virus is upsetting enough!
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me Click to EMail meClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 03:20 PM (CST)
11. "so sorry"
After reading these most recent posts, I feel pretty awful. I'm not a newbie. I've had this condition for many years, but have dealt with it pretty much alone (i.e. no support groups, etc., and that's my fault, I guess). I found this site and thought it was wonderful (I still do). I've posted a few messages, but now apologize heartily for anything I've said that may have contributed to anyone's paranoia. I thought this was a site where one could kind of open up and express one's fears and anxieties, even the bleakest kind. I'm so so sorry that I've misunderstood the whole concept here. I guess it's basically for newbies to ask questions and for "oldies" to offer strong strong support, advice and outside sources. NOt for people like me. Some of the things I said were to express what's been going on in my own head and how this site has drastically helped me put things in perspective and improve my outlook. I was NOT trying to induce paranoia. I'll continue to check out this site, but will refrain from posting, okay? My utmost apologies to all and everyone.
me
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anonymous medical person Click to EMail anonymous medical personClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-21-99, 04:15 PM (CST)
12. "this website"
i think a little perspective helps.

this is a cyber-place where people gather to discuss their personal experiences and discuss/debate hsv. many people don't have anywhere to turn to... feeling too ashamed to discuss their hsv with family and friends. often, this place is a wonderful source of support... because so many people here live with hsv.

but in regards to the discussion and debates on hsv... you have to realize that internet chatrooms, forums, etc. are a double edged sword... while you will get information, often the information is bad. my feeling is that more often than not, people are worse off by surfing the net looking for medical answers to their questions. generally, the net is full of people who know a little... and that is more dangerous than chatters that know nothing. (this category of people tend to dominate the internet)

one other scary point (regarding your "seek councelors and doctors" comment) is this: many councelors and doctors know very little about hsv. this is scary. finding a doctor who is "up to date" on hsv is a true challenge... and this forum should be a gateway to locating doctors that are experts on hsv.

you don't have to abandon this forum. just realize it's limitations (i'm speaking to everyone). in my experience, this forum is a double-edged sword... but that it is well worth sifting through. many people will quote papers that they don't understand... and throw around poorly defined and weakly supported statistics about hsv incidence, transmission rates, etc. often this forum is abusive...

when people disagree with you, don't take it personally. it is likely that they are wrong anyway.

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rubes Click to EMail rubesClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 03:19 PM (CST)
22. "since you're a "medical" person...."
perhaps you could participate and comment when you see misinformation or agree with good info. Rattus and others have done this and added a lot to the forum......

it has been suggested that there there should be a caveat re: the "medical" info posted here and perhaps that issue could be visited again....

the forum is only as good as we are as a whole.

jack/kingfish intended that this be a safe haven to talk about H -
- to feel less alone in dealing with it.
- to feel some community and possibly to learn more about H....

that in itself is a pretty amazing thing.

i think the web can be an excellent source of info - have you checked out the links on this site?

i think that both roger and jack have done their best to provide good, reliable info to the people that visit this site.

for all the flaws you cite - this is still a helluva lot better than before.

it may make it more difficult for a doc to complete his/her office visit in 15 minutes and he/she may have to do some patient education now and then - but isn't that a step in the right direction?

and like web sites, not every doc or health professional is able to give the correct advice or knows the latest about treatment options.......this site, at the very least, organizes and offers some great H info links for people to use if they chose to....

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Keyser Soze Click to EMail Keyser SozeClick to view user profileClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-22-99, 09:40 PM (CST)
23. "?"
often abusive? do you have evidence to support your claim??

KS

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had2be Click to EMail had2beClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-23-99, 03:53 AM (CST)
24. "reality"
When I found this forum a little over a year ago, I had very little to go by and I had already had the benefit of speaking with a "professional".
As was mentioned, many doctors can not offer much in the way of information when they are asked questions about being HSV
HSV effects each of us so differently
I found more useful information here than anywhere and yet I always realized it was my obligation to verify and use that information in the manner that would most benefit my health as well as others.
Who is to say that five years down the road they may find something that was not known before? (ie.. being able to transmit through viral shedding)
Whether medical personel or not... it is YOUR body... Question and learn to benefit your health.
If the process is done by debate, then so be it. (Not to mention) the psychological aspects of this disease are so overwhelming to some (maybe most) and I have always felt from the first time I read a post here that many psychological needs are addressed by each person's ability to exchange their opinions, ideas, thoughts, and FEARS.
It is like everything else in life ... You can take from it what you will.

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Cantaloupe Antelope Click to EMail Cantaloupe AntelopeClick to check IP address of the poster Nov-28-99, 06:37 PM (CST)
25. "This web site"
I found this web site about a year ago as well. Despite all the arguing, etc, it has been incredibly helpful to me. My first health care practitioner was helpful, but to find personal experiences of REAL people was a godsend. Being in the medical field also,I know how docs can be and I know how "medicine" can be. Medical progress is slo-o-o-o-o-o-w-w-w, but I'm hoping for a cure. People are now talking about AIDS as being cured or at least a chronic disease (if people can handle the regimine of taking all of the different pills at the correct time, etc!) so how can herpes be far behind? Especially if we all talk it up.

I'm also grateful for all the links, phone numbers, websites, and all the places to go to for information. I agree that this site is doing its job for giving people support and guidance, and real help.

Re: the toilet seat controversy. Medical science can't study every little question and every permutation. The best advice I got here was to inform myself, have good hygiene and take all common sense precautions. What's wrong with that if you don't make yourself crazy. And this website has helped me from not going crazy. THANKS. Cantaloupe,

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