The government is spending hundreds of millions of dollars each year in herpes research. But again, in comparison to other conditions (ie cancer, asthma, diabetes etc) it is more of an inconvenience than a debilitating condition - thus not a priority.

And don't be angry with they girl you had the "scare" with. Not many doctor's have correct info regarding this condition and developments in what we know about herpes has changed a lot in the last few years. What she told you about being contagious only during obs is a very common belief that was only recently disproven. But not everyone knows this.

As howl said, the majotity of cases are the result of transmission without symptoms being present. Any many people believe they don't have herpes because when they get std tested they assume that includes a test for herpes. It doesn't. Lastly, of those who have herpes, up to 90% don't know they have it because they're symptoms are mild (and mistaken for something else) or nonexistent. So, no, those of us with herpes didn't get it because we're stupid idiots.

muffin

"Everybody hurts sometimes.
So hold on...hold on...hold on...hold on.
Everybody hurts. You're not alone." ~ REM

We broke up, but a few months later we hooked up again. He didn't have an outbreak--not before we hooked up, not during, and not soon after either.

So... how did I get it? Oral sex + asymptomatic shedding. Not something that I even knew was possible before it happened to me.

I am really curious if someone actually knows of the situation where someone taking Valtrex infected someone else.

Howl

I heard that men who take Valtrex are less likely to have asymptomatic shedding and therefore unless they have a recognizable outbreak they will not pass this on.

Just searching for answers.

He was of the opinion that women often shed because they can't see it. He may be wrong as he does spends the majority of his time on HIV since its a little more serious, but maybe there is some truth to that...

What is the truth? All this is so contradictory. Can't we get a doctor of infectious diseases to give us the real facts?

The rate of transmission from men to women is about twice as high as the rate of transmission from women to men- even on supressive Valtrex. I'm not sure the evidence we have bears out that theory.

Howl

First, the female tract has a greater surface area with more mucosal cells than does the male urethra. The mucosal cells are more easily infected than are the keratinized epithelial cells the typical skin cells covering the penis.

Second, hormonal changes that occur during the menstural cycle may interere with local immuno responsed, making it easier for the virus to invade a woman's body.

The annual attack rate for women averaged 16 percent, that is 16 out of 100 women whose male partners had genital herpes became infected in one year.

For men, fewer than 5 out of 100 became infected in one year for an annual attack rate of less than 5 percent.

It was discovered that the spread of genital herpes was lower among couples who used condoms regularly.

From book Understanding Herpes - Lawrence Raymond Stanberry M.D. Ph.D.

He advised to use condoms to reduce the risk but no statistics were given as how much it would reduce the risk. Also the book is from 1998 - the statistics might be higher now.

I was told by my partner that she had HSV2 before we slept together. Before we were married, we used condoms (this was before I knew more about the disease and found out that even condoms are not a guarantee of safety). After we were married, we stopped using condoms (we hated them LOL), and she was taking Valtrex and I figured, "What the heck, we are going to be together for the rest of our lives so even if I got it, no biggie."

Six years later, she left me. To that point (mid-2008), I still had no outbreaks. In the fall, I went and got tested and as you would expect from the start of this post, I was HSV2+ (this was the specialized HSV2-specific Western Blot test). I was also HSV1- and thankfully HIV- (not that I ever expected I would be HIV+ as she was also negative).

I did not have ANY outbreaks until about 1 month ago. Then, out of the blue (and having had no other sexual partners since my break-up) I got an outbreak. It was fortunately not very severe (went away in about 5 days and didn't hurt terribly badly - she had told me her outbreaks were REALLY REALLY awful so I was prepared for the worst). I have had a follow-up mini-outbreak about 2 weeks ago, for just a few days.

I have no idea whether I will get any more or not. My only two outbreaks came at a time when I was very stressed over other things so I imagine that might have helped to bring it on. I also had no meds (my doctor had refused to prescribe any Valtrex or Acyclovir because I hadn't had any outbreaks, LOL). Now I have a prescription, but I am not taking it for suppression, because honestly it just doesn't seem all that big a deal for me. I will take the ACV if and when I start to feel an outbreak coming on and see what happens. Beyond that, I will just live with it.

So YES, you CAN get it while your partner is on Valtrex (and to confirm at NO time in our marriage did she have any VISIBLE outbreaks although as has been pointed out, you can have very small outbreaks that you can't even see, and of course, you can shed virally without knowing it at all).

The other thing to realize (which I only found out recently) is that it is NOT about having contact over and over again. You only need ONE CONTACT to contract the virus. Like any "numbers game" this is just a crap shoot. The odds are low in any single contact that you will get it, just like the odds of the roulette wheel coming up 17 are only 1 out of 38. But if 17 comes up the FIRST time, then that's all it takes. Valtrex/ACV and condoms essentially INCREASE the number of numbers on the wheel (i.e., the reduce the odds of hitting that "one time"), but any given person can do it ONCE and get it, even with Valtrex and condoms, and another person could do it over and over for years and NEVER get it, simply because the odds are long and you never know when your number will come up.

Like you, I've used antivirals episodically for many years. I keep some on hand. When I get one of those infrequent tingles, I take famvir for a couple days and whack the OB.

"Do the Right Thing. It will gratify some people and astound the rest." - Paraphrased from Mark Twain